One Closed Door
This blog was originally a guest post written for His Own, a band and women's ministry.
“We regret to inform you that you are no longer being considered for admission into our medical school class for the upcoming school year…”
I received many letters that began with that phrase, or some form of it, when pursuing my lifelong dream of being a pediatrician. I remember creating a poster in third grade to illustrate who I was and in the section of “what I want to be when I grow up” was a picture of a doctor. My whole family was rooting for me to go to medical school, and believed I could get there.
But we do our part and God does His. There is nothing that I would change about being a pre-medical student—I am a science nerd, through and through. I studied hard and learned about the beauty and magnificence of the human body. It afforded me incredible experiences, from observing surgeries to taking care of low-income populations in free health clinics. Many of the amazing people that I met along the way remain my good friends.
Your dreams over me are bigger than my own.
God always works for our good. Looking back on those experiences to where I am today points to the beautiful puzzle of our lives that God puts together if we offer him back our “pieces.” After not getting accepted into a school for three application cycles, I decided to take a step back and really sit with the Lord, asking what He wanted for my life. Buckle up, if you do this, because you are in for a wild ride! As St. John Paul II said, “Life with Christ is a wonderful adventure.”
I won’t lie—I was terribly heartbroken when I felt my desire to be a doctor start to fade away. I couldn’t explain it and many couldn’t understand why I wasn’t applying again. I felt like I had disappointed everyone. Still, I had to trust that God was bringing me to something different, something better, and that He would reveal it with time. The truth that my heart needed to know was: I am a beloved daughter of God. There is nothing that I need to accomplish to earn God’s love. It was there waiting for me to receive, and always would be.
I hope to encourage you by speaking to your heart from the other side of an abandoned dream, but one that was shaped into a much bigger dream than my human heart could have ever conceived. God shaped my dream into Temple and Table, which has the capacity to change our culture for the better, meal by meal, table by table, parish by parish, and community by community. Be open to His grace and He will take you on a wonderful adventure!
+Saturari,
Amanda